This will hurt me...

You don't think that you look like Beyoncé, Henry?

Blow Henry blow!

Are you free Mr Humphries?

Big Hen considers shipbuilding as a trade.

Men of science!

Making naked eggs. The kitchen, Geilston Bay. June 2013. The Casualty , Heinrich Böll: A fantastically bleak collection of short stories written just after the Second World War. Böll does a great job exploring life in Germany during and after a rather dark period. B+ . The Successor , Ismail Kadaré: Perhaps the dullest Albanian book I've ever read. Surprising really, given the potential of the subject matter. D . Making eggs naked. The kitchen, Geilston Bay. June 2013.

The fine art of the handwritten letter shall not die while Henry strides the Earth!

Don't worry, it's play-dough, not the result of the over-active secretion of the mucus membranes.

Someone has eaten the chocolate mousse! Who was it?

Happy birthday Ezra! The kitchen, Geilston Bay. July 2012. This Sunday we give you - the world - a chance to see this year's entry in the wonderful world of children's birthday cakes that I have made! Yes, it is the Mr Happy cake. Ez has originally nominated Mr Tickle as his subject of choice, but after numerous hours of planning and head-scratching, and finding no solution to the wiggly arms conundrum, I whether or not a Mr Happy cake might just be what he really wanted... He seems to have been convinced. Which leads me too: My Top Five Cakes! Dinosaur! (Henry's 5th) Wallace and Grommit Rocket! (Ezra's 3rd) Crocodile! (Henry's 3rd) Shark! (Henry's 4th) The Nan in the Moon! (Ezra's 3rd)

All of a sudden the question 'Who wants to lick the spoon' has taken a very competitive turn...

Eat your heart out Gordon Ramsay!

Jam + scones = sticky crumbs!

Art is all around us. Home, Geilston Bay. September 2011. Just the one book completed this week – Stalin Ate My Homework – Alexei Sayle's bittersweet memoir of a Communist Liverpudlian upbringing. Essentially a collection of vignettes comprising of events and memories loosely catalogued in chronological order. In many respects, Stalin Ate My Homework is a tale of a boy and his parents. Joe – who worked on the railways and was a solid union man – and Molly – a foul mouthed red-haired firebrand who also spoke Yiddish. Although they were not the only Jewish atheist communist family in Liverpool, they were probably the most colourful. The book is really an account of how comedian Alexi came to be. His childhood was one of ideological rigour coupled with a little bit of fun. This usually meant an outing to see Alexander Nevsky rather than the ideologically suspect Bambi , and regular visits across the iron curtain (often involving tours of factories or sites of Nazi atrocities). As ...

Him: "Hello Dave." You: "I'm sorry?" Him: "Is that Dave?" You: "Oh, I'm sorry, I think you've got the wrong house." Him: "Okay, is Dave there?" You: "No, there's no one called Dave here." Him: "Okay."

Henry’s idea of an ideal hors d'œuvre is a stuffed vol-au-vent . At home, Geilston Bay. February 2011. Henry made the tasty treat that you can see above all by himself , proving that at four, he’s already a better cook that 43 percent of the population. All of these fruit ‘n custard myrtille, fraise et crème anglaise vol-au-vents were gobbled up within seconds of their completion. Indeed, there was barely time for photographs… Which brings me to today’s all important Sunday Top Five , The Top Five Tasty Treat Desserts That Have Some Level Of Effectiveness In Getting My Two Very Loud Sons To Just Sit Down, Be Quiet And Stuff Their Mouths ! Custard : plain and simple, fraise et crème anglaise is a favourite of all in the household! Semolina Pudding : heavy on the cream and raisons, semolina sans salmonella is a huge hit. Golden syrup dumplings : although initially treated with some trepidation, this humble ocker treatie is now a firm fixture on the winter menu. Ice Cream : I sc...