This will hurt me...

I could go some of these Indian Root Pills right now! Argyle Street, Hobart. December 2011. Before I get into the Q and A today, I just had to look up the tale of this old ad [above]. It turns out that Dr. Morse's Indian Root Pills were one of the great success stories of the good old patent medicine industry. The (possibly shady) ‘Dr.’ Morse asserted that the pills contained a secret blend of herbal ingredients that would help "cleanse the blood." Indeed, ‘dirty blood’ appeared to be the cause of all diseases to ‘Dr.’ Morse. I will confess to being slightly disappointed to not being able to access the miracle drug these days. They sound just the ticket! Alas, onwards to another Tuesday Q and A courtesy of Sunday Stealing. It’s a challenge this week – The TV Show Meme – especially difficult because I’ve watched a sum total of about eight television shows in the past six years… But first, a note from the Q and A designer! Before reading the questions, nominate ...

Lately, Henry has taken to telling me how much he'd like to be in a wheelchair. I keep telling him that life in a wheelchair isn't a barrel of monkeys, and definitely isn't something to aspire to (with all due respect to those of you in wheelchairs). Anyway, to prove the point, Ezra spent the day in a little cart like a bloke with no legs.

Even the splendid Mount Wellington is blighted by the curse of the phallus. No, it's not a nuclear ICBM primed and ready to put New Zealand back into the stone age. Nor is it a TELEPHONE tower enabling spotty teens to cyber bully the delicate little flowers quivering in front of their tiny keypads. No, it's dedicated to the wonders of television and radio ! Without this baby, the good folk of Hobart would have no idea about Falcon the balloon boy, and we wouldn't know that Michael Jackson is dead (or is he...?) But it is Theme Thursday , and I am not here to talk about television, as the theme is TELEPHONE. It might not surprise you, but I hate the TELEPHONE [it's number thirty seven on my list]. I hate answering the phone (I generally don't unless I'm getting paid). I hate the way that they ring, buzz, beep and rattle. I hate people that go on about their phones. I hate telemarketers, teleprinters, telegeography. Man, I even hate Telly from Sesame Street.

I've utilised the zoom a little bit to see what's happening up there on the bridge. If you look very closely, I think that you can just about see Captain Stubing chastising "Gopher" Smith for another of his whacky, harebrained schemes. I do like the fact that Gopher somehow made it into Congress after The Love Boat went off air. It seems odd to me that Captain Stubing didn’t somehow end up President though. Similarly, it seems a great shame to me that Barack Obama became the first African American President, instead of Jimmie Walker (J. J. Evans in Good Times ). Don’t tell me that the inauguration speech couldn’t have been livened up with a “ Dy-no-MITE ” and a spin.

Here is a photo from a bit further back to give you an sense of scale. The Love Boat was quite popular in my household. As a family that had a tradition of seafaring, it gritty, realistic portrayal of life at sea appealed to the salty sea dogs that are the McCracken clan. My brother had a theory that Bartender Isaac Washington had bedded more ladies than Wilt Chamberlain. The reasoning behind this was that he was so slick with the one liners, could handle any cocktail request thrown at him, and was essentially unflappable despite the shenanigans around him that his essential goodness would mean that he was just so darn nice to reject a lady who propositioned him, as it was all about making their holidays something special . You just don't see professionalism like that these days, and more is the pity.

I have been disturbed by the amount of anti-Elmo propaganda that I have encountered over the past few weeks. I have heard him variously described as “too mainstream”, “Sesame Street’s version of Jah-Jah Binks”, “F&*#$@g annoying”, and most commonly, “Elmo has been the ruination of Sesame Street.” Intrigued by other people’s apparent loathing of the furry red monster, I naively Googled “I hate Elmo” and got three hundred and twenty-nine thousand responses. There is even a group who have organised an International "I Hate Elmo" Week ! Having a look at most commentaries, people seem to feel that Elmo is somewhat low in IQ compared to the other Muppets on Sesame Street. But my understanding is that Elmo's character is three-and-a-half, and his development was designed to introduce a character with the mentality of a toddler, someone the really little ones could relate to while their older siblings enjoyed other aspects of the show. When contacted by this blog, Elmo decli...

Look I know that this is like, eight years late, but I only just saw this a couple of days ago, and I really think that it is the funniest thing I've seen in years, so I thought that I'd share. If you saw this one of the previous ten times that it circled teh internets, think of this as a pleasant reminder.