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Dead artists always bring out an older, richer crowd.


I appreciate good art, I really do. The problem is that there is surprisingly little of it. While the good stuff does exist, the majority of modern art in Tasmania today is more likely to resemble a junkyard of any old crap with a five hundred word bit of justification sticky-taped up on the wall next to it.

Honestly, if bullshitting equates to art, then say hello to Monet!

What compounds my distaste, is the fact that most of the bullshitting is all so clichéd and predictable. Man, if all you've got to do is ramble on, at least make it original!

That's why my eye was drawn to this little bugger above. Is it art?

It is nestled in what used to be a working port, and features a little plague that someone has managed to work up in their spare time:


Of course, the mysterious art critic loses marks for failing to close their quotation marks, an odd capitalisation of the word "foundry" and "bollard", "where" instead of "were", both misspelling and not capitalising "Picasso", the grammar Nazi within can't let that slide, but I appreciate the effort more than some of the other efforts around here!

That said, like Mr or Ms "Thru" the other day, I call nong!

Comments

Sue said…
You forgot to mention the capital B in bollard, the 'where' instead of 'were', the misspelling of Picasso and the the lack of a comma where there should be one!
I HATE bad spelling and grammar too...so you can imagine how frustrating my days are... working in the education system.
And a bollard is a bollard is a bollard....???
Kris McCracken said…
Sue, I meant to go back and add that (pre-post you see). Corrected now!

You should try working at university level, where one may make the (erroneous) assumption that the barely literate are excluded.
smudgeon said…
As someone who attended "art school" for two years, I always thought the major problem with most art students (who eventually grow out of being defiantly snotty and emerge with their degrees as as the essence of smugness) is they think they're being awfully clever when they, for instance, stick a poorly written plaque on a bollard.

As a photography student, I was naturally above all that hoodwinking & self indulgence...
Kris McCracken said…
Me, I wouldn't last in art school. I would have no doubt been driven to kill some one.

First year philosophy was difficult enough. So many imbeciles, so little clue as to their own cluelessness!
KL said…
Honestly, I don't get the head and tail of modern day sculptures, though I get some understanding of paintings.
Beth said…
Ah Kris, I see a kindred soul destined to wander the streets with a bottle of white-out looking for those offensive "grocers' apostrophes" on restaurant menus and billboards.
yamini said…
I share ur sentiments regarding most of the "MODERN ART" doing the rounds today.

Just because one can't understand what the hell is there on the canvas shouldn't qualify it as a "masterpiece". Really, now!!!
Sue said…
What frightens me the most in the school system though, Kris, is the fact that it is the teachers who are just as likely to be the ones who misspell more than the students!
magiceye said…
strange but true..
stromsjo said…
Art can certainly be pretentious nonsense. Then again, if we all liked all works of art, they wouldn't be very provocative.
Most of the "great" works of modern art are a great joke. I think that works made by Donatello, Miquelangelo, DaVinci, Velazquez, Goya, Monet, Manet, Renoir, ... can't be compare with many of the actual works of modern art.
There was a spanish sculptor and painter named Miró (I don't know if you know him) that I don't understand his works. He usually painted a red point in a big white picture: is this art?
Kris McCracken said…
KL, people like Damien Hurst get me. I mean, really, it’s all nonsense! Yet the market values it in the millions!
Kris McCracken said…
Beth, it is a hard existence!
Kris McCracken said…
Yamini, it’s the erosion of actual skills that get me, especially when so often they are passed over because of better PR!
Kris McCracken said…
Sue, it just isn’t valued as much. I blame violent video games!
Kris McCracken said…
Magiceye, indeed!
Kris McCracken said…
Per, what about poo in a can?
Kris McCracken said…
MurciaDailyPhoto, *some* of Miró’s paintings impress me, just like Franz Marc, Kandinsky and (especially) Paul Klee, but the parade of imitators and the minimalists (visual arts) depress me. I mean (literally) I can do that!

Hirst pisses me off the most, because he's a "concept" guy. He doesn't even do the work! Honestly, all he does is come up with some bullshit idea, someone else paints a few spots on a plate or stuffs a sheep, and the money comes rolling in.

I must be thick or something, because I don't understand the attraction, it seems to me the most ludicrous scam around!
yamini said…
I agree to that.
Kris, I'm agree with your response.
Kris McCracken said…
MDP, even better!
stromsjo said…
I felt like responding "well, if it's done in good taste" but no. Poo in a can is something we could do without.
Kris McCracken said…
Per, if only poo were gold, I'd be rich!
stromsjo said…
...and I too would be fairly wealthy...
Kris McCracken said…
Per, our house is a poo factory right now. The boys are churning them out and I am stupidly flushing them instead of canning them!

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