This will hurt me...

Drool . It's a way of life...

Seven Mile Beach, February 2010. Winter is near, the message is clear: I miss the beach . The Beach , Robert Graves Louder than gulls the little children scream Whom fathers haul into the jovial foam; But others fearlessly rush in, breast high, Laughing the salty water from their mouthes-- Heroes of the nursery. The horny boatman, who has seen whales And flying fishes, who has sailed as far As Demerara and the Ivory Coast, Will warn them, when they crowd to hear his tales, That every ocean smells of tar.

Note to self: Don't trust either child to hold the bread for the ducks...

Breaking all the rules. April, 2010. If you don't mind me saying it, I have magnificent legs. Ask anybody, they'll tell you.

Ezra has a beguiling little habit of eating the bread that we're intending to give the ducks. I'm not sure that they mind, but it sure as hell gives Henry the irrits!

Sunrise over the Elizabeth Street Pier, Hobart. April, 2010. Theme Thursday and I don't have a BICYCLE. BICYCLE! I could maybe ride a BICYCLE off the pier, but it's too cold. I've heard of underwater BICYCLEs, but they're no use to me. It's too windy at the moment to ride to work, as I'd be blown off a BICYCLE, and no doubt off the bridge with it. No, BICYCLE is of no use to me.

How many times? It is Duplo , not Lego !

A flock of Eastern Rosella ( Platycercus eximius ) grazing away at Geilston Bay High School, April 2010. At the moment there are a good eighty-odd Platycercus eximius currently calling the grounds of Geilston Bay High School home. A fiery parrot, these buggers don't take "no" for an answer. Indeed, just the other day, Henry, Ezra and I could be seen fighting tooth and nail with a gang of the crimson hooded toughs. It got so willing, that the crimson masks were so widespread that you could differentiate between man and beast!

Two for one of a hunk looking at a tiger. I like the tones of this one. Very Autumn, with a 1970s-vibe. The jumper is - of course - one of Jen's creations. You can also see it here , and here , modelled by another fellow you might recognise.

Is it a stupid question to ask where the posters warning women of the dangers presented by lecherous soldiers/sailors/candlestick-makers? Was venereal disease back in the good old days™ limited to a cabal of crafty hussies looking to put our vulnerable and exploitable menfolk out of action using the oldest trick in the book.

Anyone for tennis? Geilston Bay Tennis Club, April 2010 . I'm no good at tennis. More Roger Frugardi (Medieval knife wielder ) than Roger Federer, I'm prone to the fumbling faux par on the double handed backspin. It's a shame really, as I have the legs to carry those little skirts very nicely...

It's official, Autumn is here! Here, Henry is doing an excellent impersonation of Robert Frost .

The tigers of Richmond. ZooDoo, April 2010. There are a couple of Bengal Tigers to be found at ZooDoo in Richmond. Fortunately, these are fine and healthy specimens, more than capable of tearing your head off and using it as a play toy. Unlike some other Richmond Tigers that come to mind... On that, is this the worst Richmond side ever? I mean, the great teams of 1987-89 were atrocious, but were they THIS bad? Does the absence of Richo mean that the dross running out (and coaching) in 2004 would trounce today's toothless Tigers? Would the likes of Brian Leys, Mick "Don't kick it!" Laffey, Chris "Remember him" Pym, Richard "The Pres" Nixon, Des "Socks down" Ryan, and Mark "Useless" Eustice get a run in the current line up?

Do you see that wear on the leather armrest there? That was Ezra. Gnawing. I think that he's part beaver.

Self portrait, Sullivan's Cove. April 2010. Time for another Sunday Top Five! Today, we're looking at the Top Five Ways That Emperor Penguins Commit Suicide . 5: Sitting on a public bus in Mobile, Alabama, and loudly start bemoaning the fact that "Grant didn't come down here and finish the job proper." 4: Walrus dogging. 3: Infiltrating the Collingwood cheer squad, and in the middle of the second quarter, say in a clear voice, "steady on chaps, I'm not sure that you should be talking about girls that way." 2: Barbiturate overdose. 1: Eating fourteen kilograms of unpopped popcorn, the wrapping oneself in an electric blanket set to high, THEN sitting in a sauna, then letting the ensuing popping rip one apart from within.