Saturday, May 05, 2012
If you ever decide to swim in the rivers and creeks of Tasmania, particularly those located in forests, consider shoes...
The Pig, Roald Dahl
In England once there lived a big
And wonderfully clever pig.
To everybody it was plain
That Piggy had a massive brain.
He worked out sums inside his head,
There was no book he hadn't read.
He knew what made an airplane fly,
He knew how engines worked and why.
He knew all this, but in the end
One question drove him round the bend:
He simply couldn't puzzle out
What LIFE was really all about.
What was the reason for his birth?
Why was he placed upon this earth?
His giant brain went round and round.
Alas, no answer could be found.
Till suddenly one wondrous night.
All in a flash he saw the light.
He jumped up like a ballet dancer
And yelled, "By gum, I've got the answer!"
"They want my bacon slice by slice
"To sell at a tremendous price!
"They want my tender juicy chops
"To put in all the butcher's shops!
"They want my pork to make a roast
"And that's the part'll cost the most!
"They want my sausages in strings!
"They even want my chitterlings!
"The butcher's shop! The carving knife!
"That is the reason for my life!"
Such thoughts as these are not designed
To give a pig great piece of mind.
Next morning, in comes Farmer Bland,
A pail of pigswill in his hand,
And piggy with a mighty roar,
Bashes the farmer to the floor…
Now comes the rather grizzly bit
So let's not make too much of it,
Except that you must understand
That Piggy did eat Farmer Bland,
He ate him up from head to toe,
Chewing the pieces nice and slow.
It took an hour to reach the feet,
Because there was so much to eat,
And when he finished, Pig, of course,
Felt absolutely no remorse.
Slowly he scratched his brainy head
And with a little smile he said,
"I had a fairly powerful hunch
"That he might have me for his lunch.
"And so, because I feared the worst,
"I thought I'd better eat him first."
Friday, May 04, 2012
You learn to love by loving - by paying attention and doing what one thereby discovers has to be done.
There is no cannibalism in the British navy, absolutely none, and when I say none, I mean there is a certain amount.
The fences keep slipping underneath the dunes. Howrah Beach. April 2012.
Just the one review this week, Polish authors Witold Gombrowicz's Pornografia. Essentially the tale of two bored (and filthy-minded) old men who find themselves in small-town Poland during the occupation in 1943. The two central characters indulge in a world of their own vices as the world around them is collapsing - in both a political and cultural sense.
It is an odd book in many ways, and quite slow-moving. Only for the patient.
Thursday, May 03, 2012
A very appropriate Theme Thursday today, as I had lined up this shot of my FAMILY well in advance.
FAMILY is a funny old concept. Some people say. “you can’t choose your FAMILY” but I am not convinced of that. Lots of people seem to be choosing their FAMILY. They have a FAMILY, change their mind, then bugger off and start a new one. It’s happening all over the place!
However, I have already chosen my FAMILY. All up, they are a decent, dependable lot. I’m thankful that they’re all so good looking, because it does make the hard times more bearable.
In an approach that we should have taken with rabbits and cane toads, we’ve kept the numbers down lest we be overrun with the buggers (they’re loud enough as it is) and my ethical object to polygamy has kept the marital situation in check. Anyone who knows anything about that television show that was not in the slightest about Mormons will tell you that one wife should be plenty enough for one man.
Wednesday, May 02, 2012
Tuesday, May 01, 2012
The propagandist's purpose is to make one set of people forget that certain other sets of people are human.
A natural bunker atop Mount Wellington is the ideal place to check out the latest inter-ballistic missile tests that we've been planning ever since Henry got that science kit last Christmas...
Another Tuesday Q and A courtesy of Sunday Stealing. It's a bit of a shake-up this week, less 'Q and A' and more 'complete the sentence' really. Thus, I present to you The Semi Charmed Meme, Part One
1. My uncle once: got my father imprisoned for the weekend.
2. Never in my life: have I insincerely professed love.
3. When I was five: I am sure that I was naughtier than my boy Henry.
4. High School was: not something that enjoyed in the slightest.
5. I will never forget: that the important things in life cannot be bought and sold.
6. I once met: someone with an odious personality. It didn’t end well.
7. There’s this girl I know who: must have the patience of a saint.
8. Once, at a bar: I took a punt and then everything in my life changed.
9. By noon, I’m usually: ready for either a) my run; or b) a nap.
10. Last night: was like most other nights.
11. If only I had: been a little less risk-averse.
12. Next time I go to church: will be the first time that I ever go to church!
13. Jonathan Frid: is not a name that I am familiar with.
14. What worries me most: are things that I have no control on whatsoever.
15. When I turn my head left, I see: a beautiful full sun perched above a gum tree.
16. When I turn my head right, I see: a shaded pot plant.
17. You know I’m lying when: I tell you that I am indeed interested in your view on politics.
18. What I miss most about the 80s: are the choices that I didn’t make.
19. If I was a character in Shakespeare, I’d be: naughty Iago.
20. By this time next year: I hope to be somewhere different than I am today.
Monday, April 30, 2012
The Internet is a wonderful place filled with the rich and varied treasures of the world holds (as well as many ill-informed opinions.) The following are some things that I've had a look at in the last week. I call this: a Compendium of Click-throughs for Monday Morning..
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Ezra just told me that he wants to be a 'Scientologist' when he grows up.
I dearly hope that he meant 'palaeontologist'...
This Sunday Top Five I am taking the opportunity to vent just a little bit. Yes, it is my Top Five Things This Week That Are Annoying Me (That Do Not Involve Children)!
- Hipsters. Or just anyone who is generally badly dressed but looks down their nose at other punters in the street because of their clothes/ haircut/ appropriately-sized eyewear.
- People who push in line to order food, but when they eventually are asked their order they don’t know what they want.
- Having to flick through all your tabs in your browser just to see which page is playing that stupid and annoying music so you can kill it.
- Forms that ask questions requiring an answer but don’t provide anything like the amount of space for you to adequately respond.
- When people say ‘literally’ but they really do not literally mean it.