This will hurt me...

Here's Henry trying out the public bidet up in Burnie back in February. We really do need some of those around here...

Roll up, roll up, roll up! Everyone's a winner! The Lucky Sticks stall, Lindisfarne North Primary School Fair, Lindisfarne. March 2012. So the Lindisfarne North Primary School Fair has been done and run. Our (and by OUR I mainly mean JEN's ) contribution - the afore-mentioned Lucky Sticks stall - was a raging success, with all sticks sold and prizes awarded. Moreover, the fair itself was proven a massive success, with the school raking in the dollars and proving that plenty of parents and teachers were keen to give their time and energy to making it happen. Even better, the whole thing was achieved without any kind of hitch! Well, unless you count the kid that broke his arm on the jumping castle and the bloke that needed the ambulance for the burns. Anyway, there are always going to be a few kinks ! Anyway, well done to the Lindisfarne North Primary School Fair organising committee and all of the volunteers, and my apologies to that girl who bought fourteen dollars worth of lu...

Ezra ponders the nature of "being" and nothingness. Either a thing is (or at least was ) or a thing isn't (or at least wasn't ). Can a thing ever be a not or a wasn't ? More importantly, can the answer be found in this estuary?

Parallel Lines (Don't Do It). Duke Street, Sandy Bay. March 2012. I'm late! I'll have to be quick. Two books this week. The first Who Was David Weiser? by the Polish novelist Pawel Huelle. This is a fantastic book. We don't ever quite answer the question posed in the title, but the journey is magnificent. A tender, lovely work. Highly recommended! Second up is a spot of literary theory, The Two Lolitas by Michael Maar. A (vaguely) interesting bit of literary detective work. I’ll be frank, I found it a somewhat dull. Your time would be better spent reading Nabokov himself, or even the ‘lost’ work of Heinz von Lichberg (the author of the ‘other’, less famous Lolita). Only for the completists.

Now all we have to do is liberally spray them with bright orange fake tan, pump them full of steroids and Mr Universe here we come!

Two fool-proof hiding places! Derwent Avenue walking path, Lindisfarne. March 2012. Bear with me for a MOMENT… Theme Thursday has come around and I am kind-of trapped in the MOMENT. You know what I mean, it happens now and again. A MOMENT slows down and it, well, not quite pauses but it floats . It lingers and it exists for much more than a mere MOMENT. For that MOMENT, everything stops. Sound stops. Movement stops and even though it probably isn’t really more than a MOMENT or even a fraction of a MOMENT, it feels real (really-real? Hyper-real?) for much, much more than a MOMENT. It’s like the first time that you decided that you were going to lean in and kiss her. You steel yourself and prepare yourself for the MOMENT. But it itself is a MOMENT and you don’t want to be lost in the MOMENT but the point of such a MOMENT is to get lost in the MOMENT. Are you following me?

The perfect time for me to pour boiling oil down the stairs and secure the fort!

Watery Wednesday and I have opted for an afternoon delight ! Because, you know, my motto has always been ‘when it is right, it is right’. Why wait until the middle of a cold, dark night when everything is a little clearer in the light of day? And you know that the night is always going to be there any way. Yes, most of my day-to-day decisions are delegated to the Starland Vocal Band.

Judging by the markings on this feather... yes... yes... I'm almost certain... Yes, I'm almost certain that this once belonged to a Tyrannosaurus Rex !

Die stahlhartes Gehäuse. State Library of Tasmania, Hobart. March 2012. Another Thursday another Q and A stolen from Sunday Stealing! This week: The Her Head Is Part Missing Meme . 1. What is your most annoying habit? Being always right seems to annoy a lot of people! 2. What habit would you change of your partners? (come on no-one is perfect!) [Editor's note: Not only does it assume you have A partner, but it is written as though you have multiple ones. If you do not currently have a partner or many partners, simply tell us about your last one. BW] The tendency towards self-flagellation in the area of parenting is something that I would like to see altered. 3. Horrors or Chick Flicks? Erm… Philosophically maudlin Eastern European mediations on the nature of being. 4. What is the most outrageous thing you have done in the back row of the movies? Throwing sticky Jaffas . 5. When have you lied to get a job? I’ve never lied to get a job. What would be the point? Some way or another y...

Okay then, for the major prize: What is Ezra looking at?

A picture of a picture of krill. Tasmanian Museum and Art Gallery, Hobart. February 2012. The Internet is a wonderful place filled with the rich and varied treasures of the world holds (as well as numerous .avi clips of barely recognisable 'celebrities' having sex.) The following are some things that I've had a look at in the last week. I call this: a Compendium of Click-throughs for Monday Morning... I stumbled across George Orwell's 1940 review of Mein Kampf . Choice selection: "I should like to put it on record that I have never been able to dislike Hitler." In Orwell's defence though, he also said, " I have reflected that I would certainly kill him if I could get within reach of him..." Good news! Reading lots of novels makes your brain stronger... A decent little article on why it is a good thing to know where our food comes from. History Today has a nice piece on why - since the nineteenth century - attitudes to drugs have been as much ab...

Henry's hundred metre splits have been reasonably good since the carnival, but he has a tendency to not lift his knees high enough when he hits the seventy-ninth/ eightieth rep. I'm finding that the electric shock do encourage him, but he's developing a bit of a nervous twitch that I think might impinge upon his reaction times upon starting. We must find a new 'rehabilitation' technique...

Security measures in a cell. Richmond Gaol, Richmond. The Richmond Gaol is the oldest intact gaol in Australia. Building of the gaol commenced in 1825, and predates the establishment of the far more famous penal colony at Port Arthur by five years. It continued to house prisoners right up until 1928. All of which logically leads me to today's Sunday Top Five : Mein Schönster Würste Aller Zeiten (Und Nicht Nur Die Deutschen)! Cumberland sausage ! Bratwurst ! Chorizo ! Frankfurter Rindswurst ! Csabai Kolbász !