This will hurt me...

Got to love the news.

I have been disturbed by the amount of anti-Elmo propaganda that I have encountered over the past few weeks. I have heard him variously described as “too mainstream”, “Sesame Street’s version of Jah-Jah Binks”, “F&*#$@g annoying”, and most commonly, “Elmo has been the ruination of Sesame Street.” Intrigued by other people’s apparent loathing of the furry red monster, I naively Googled “I hate Elmo” and got three hundred and twenty-nine thousand responses. There is even a group who have organised an International "I Hate Elmo" Week ! Having a look at most commentaries, people seem to feel that Elmo is somewhat low in IQ compared to the other Muppets on Sesame Street. But my understanding is that Elmo's character is three-and-a-half, and his development was designed to introduce a character with the mentality of a toddler, someone the really little ones could relate to while their older siblings enjoyed other aspects of the show. When contacted by this blog, Elmo decli...

Look I know that this is like, eight years late, but I only just saw this a couple of days ago, and I really think that it is the funniest thing I've seen in years, so I thought that I'd share. If you saw this one of the previous ten times that it circled teh internets, think of this as a pleasant reminder.

I'm just gutted that the scrag lost all that weight. It literally has ruined my week. I shall speak no more of it!

Thank god the Blue Team finally won. The look on Moanalitta's face was priceless. I noticed her mouth agape as she noted Laura's weight loss, and was wondering how many Mars Bars would fit in there. I'm wagering at least eleven or twelve.

That Munnalita would have to be the most loathesome individual on TV right now. I take that as a given. The Biggest Loser thing is getting so bad, that I had a dream about it last night. I went something like this: Shannan and Michelle briskly jog up to the front door of the white house. Cut to one on one with Michelle: "I don't know what it was that I was feeling, but something wasn't right." Shot of Shannon opening the door. Cut to Shannon: "OH NO! We open the door, and would you believe it!" Shot of Marty's limp body hanging from the top rail of the staircase. Cut back to Shannon: "There's Marty, hanging from the staircase. [Excitedly] He's only gone and hanged himself!" Shot of Marty's eyeballs bulging out. He’s clearly been dead a while. Cut to Michelle: "There's Marty hanging there, and I could tell he was dead straight away, and man was I PISSED!" Shot of Shannon and Michelle bewildered standing next to Marty...

Damien has proven to be as big a cop out merchant as Gerard. At least Jules stood by her decision (even if I think that it was the wrong one). For Damien to wimp out too weeks running, AND THEN try and blame others, well, I guess it helps explain why he got to 210 kilos. I still feel sorry for Laura. She's done a heap better than P’eta, who for some reason has everyone fooled. Laura has lost more weight each week, despite weighing 30 kilos less, and everyone keeps crapping on about how great P’eta is and how useless Laura is. I don’t get it. Voting for Michael over Gerard is a dumb as the red teams call on Alex over the bitchy three. Also, it was so heart-warming to see Gerard true to form and quit during the swim, on the first day back at training: "Oh god, this water's too wet! I can't swim in this! I prefer a dryer sort of water! It's too hard!" For Damien to whine about Gerard at this point is nauseating. Unfortunately, his attitude has left me with only t...

I appreciate that TBL is essentially little more than a “reality-based” game show with a weight loss theme, but all of these twists and rules that encourage clique-y behaviour is really getting annoying. I mean, they just spent three days building up this team bullshit, getting in “the commando” to emphasise teamwork and the common good, and then go and switch players around to mix things up. It’s like they’re devising ways to get people’s minds OFF OF losing weight. That said, the happiest person around should be that Laura, who is best off away from the arsehole gang of three Courtney, Munnalita and the insipid Pati. I’d like to through in that Marty too, ‘cos for a bloke who goes on about how difficult it is throwing off Alex and Laura (the biggest losers of each week, I might add), he doesn’t seem to have a problem shafting them and keeping no hopers like the other three. I’ll give Greg the benefit of the doubt here. Anyway, Laura will have a lot more luck in team blue without the ...

Gerard's ability to piss and moan, and then quit at every opportunity really does amaze me. Does he not know that they're filming him? Doesn't he have any pride? Every exercise, every challange, every temptation he groans and moans, and eventually loses his temper. I'm interested to know what he might have expected going on a weight loss reality TV show. If he put as much effort into losing weight as he does his whinging, he'd have dropped 20 kilos by now. If they continue with this stupid rewarding of the weak, the he'll be eating pizzas, cakes and whatever every week, 'cos with cat's bum gone, he's a dead cert to be voted off at first opportunity.

Kelly is gone. The right result. If I had to watch another week of that sour faced cow, I'd switch off. Nice to see the little alliance collapse too, that sort of stuff always pisses me off. Next week hopefully Courtney will get the arse (fnarr, fnarr), and that should be the end of all the silly buggers.

I don't like the bloke, but by christ it's annoying that half the TBL contestents can't seem to say "Gerard". It's all "Jarred"  this, "Jarred" that. His name is "Gerard" people. It's not that hard. Bob, Steve Irwin Jr, Jillian and the other one seem to manage it alright.

Gerard, way to go in making even more of an absolute dickhead of  yourself.  I understand why he gave in, it's clear that he's in line to be voted off by the blue team at first opportunity. But be a man about it and say "I'm going after immunity, I can't afford to promise to resist the temptation". But no, better to make an absolute dick of yourself, make a promise you never intended to keep, break it not once, not twice, but THREE times in ever more excruciating ways! I'm sure that the kids will be bound to be proud of their dad now. Although the positive aspect of the whole sorry scenario is that they will all be able to watch Gerard's glorious display of human weakness on that beautiful new wide-screen TV as one big happy family! And really, how much of an annoying prick must Gerard be in real life in order to be such a dead cert for voting off when there's a lazy, annoying bitch like Kelly in the team?

He got the McCracken kiss of death and that bitch Courtney conspired to vote him off. I like The Biggest Loser and all, but all this bullshit survivor/BB crap is annoying. The point is supposed to be weight loss, and the fact that the two of the four fatties who voted him off seem to be lazy, insipid, useless types does not compel me to watch much more. Come on Greg, summon the wog boy within and go on to win the show!

Alright, I'm watching it again. I'm barracking for Alex and Greg, and hope that vicious little bitch Courtney gets what's coming to him. He's just nasty! And here's hoping Gerard is booted out sooner rather than later, he's just annoying.