"I was lonely," I mutter. She sighs. "Maybe you need to stop using that word as an excuse to mistreat yourself.”
Jen all at sea. Little Howrah Beach, Hobart. March 2021.
A Lonely Girl is a Dangerous Thing by Jessie Tu
This one is a very dark and - at times - quite disturbing book. I initially found it quite difficult to find my groove with the story and connect with the central narrator. She is aware of the difficulty that her personality radiates in her interpersonal interactions with others, which extends out to the reader. Her intense loneliness only exacerbates this.
That said, as we learn more about Jena's backstory and the sources of her trauma, I found myself softening towards her and wishing that she'd end the self-harming behaviour and look ahead instead of behind.
The pivot for me was in exiting the odious Mark's gravitational pull and heading off to New York. It is here that Jessie Tu really flexes her creative muscles and (partially) frees Jena from her torpor. From here, I found the book much more engaging, and I was keen to see where things would lead.
Filled with vivid descriptions of cold, disengaged and disconcerting sexual encounters, the book explores how a world in which sex can be freely viewed and arranged can lead to unhealthy loops of activity so far removed from pleasure that they look far more like self-harm derived from unreconciled trauma. Given her introduction, I was surprised by the extent to which I found myself hoping for Jena to break through and succeed in a way that might make her happy.
This book does a magnificent job in detailing the corrosive aspects of loneliness and isolation. It is a hard but rewarding read.
⭐ ⭐ ⭐ 1/2
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