Skip to main content

In the Beginning, the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move


Here is Australia's next top supermodel in action, playing on a wooden fort with a pink pram! The pram is an effective rouse to smuggle as many balls as possible to the throw at anyone silly enough to approach the fort. Plus, the chicks kind of dig the kind of sensitive, new age man who is happy to be seen marching back and forth with a pink pram.

Unsatisfied with my previous post, FF has asked what it is precisely that makes me uncomfortable about young people embracing the love of Jesus with the sort of verve and vigour normally associated with a cat on heat.

Well, I'm not sure if there is a precise reason. Perhaps it just all seems unnatural to me. Someone at death's door I can imagine it, you're hedging your bets, I can understand the logic to that. Some profound trauma? Yeah, the world loses it's bearings, religion can give you a foundation that'll get you through, I see that. Some hot young thang with legs up to here and an arse just thinking about that will keep you warm through long, lonely nights, absolutely! That said, I'd imagine this isn't what they have in mind when they're talking about letting the love of Christ in your heart, however.

A relatively well adjusted, sociable, stable youngster with friends, loving family and future prospects upping and joining the happy clappers is just plain odd to me, I can express it no more eloquently than that. In my (admittedly limited) experience, it has a touch of Invasion of the Body Snatchers about it.

The one example that truly stands out is a young woman that I knew when I lived where I used to live before I live where I live now (a wordsmith, you say?). To my knowledge, she was of limited faith when I knew her in Burnie. By that, I mean that if she had faith, it didn't come up in any conversation with me (just how I like it). Two years down the track (away from home, doing the uni thing), I bump into her again in the park. We stop and have a chat, all very pleasant. Halfway through me complaining about Patti Smith wailing on REM's latest record, out of nowhere she starts shaking. Now, I'm not talking "having a fit" as much as "little dog straining on a poo". So I clear my throat and I ask, "ahhh, are you okay?" and with a broad smile and eyes lit up like a Republican senator spying George Michael entering a public toilet, she tells me "oh I am wonderful, I just felt the love of Christ pulsate through my body!"

"RIIIIIGGGHHHHHHTTTTTTT, I say", looking at my watch and glancing out the corner of my eye hoping to see a pair of fellows in white coats with butterfly nets hiding in the bushes. Now, I could be wrong, I accept that. There is a chance that she could have had Christ's pulsating son-of-God man love all over her, in her, around her (one of the many benefits of an omnipresent being), but at the time I have echoes of cuckoo clocks chiming inside my head.

You see, I don't think that Christ has ever really tried to put any pulsating love (oh err missus) in me. If I'm honest, I don't believe it you see. Yeah, I ascribe to a (broadly) Judeo-Christian moral framework [do unto others, let he without sin, all that jazz], but to my over-educated brain we're all just squishy luck walking around the place trying to get along as best we can. I reckon two blokes should be able to get it on wherever they like, bacon is tasty, and that a woman is just as sexy "in her uncleanliness" as any other time of the month.

If you're raised right in the thick of it? Cool, I get it, fair play to 'ya. Diff'rent stokes for diff'rent folks. If you're choosing it at age seventeen? Hmmm, free country, but I can't help but wonder...

Comments

smudgeon said…
I was enjoying this little story until you got to:

"I just felt the love of Christ pulsate through my body"

And then I lost half the mouthful of peanuts I was chewing on, all over my desk. You should have put a warning there, young man.

I can't help but agree with the weirdness assessment.
Kris McCracken said…
They were her exact words. It shall remain with me until my dying days.
USelaine said…
Well, for the love of Christ......
Jules said…
I am with you all the way on this one - it has often amazed me as well. I too laughed too and snorted water up my nose - hmmm maybe that's what the love of God feels like when it pulsates thru your body?????

PS The sulphur smells pretty rotten when it is pumping but at the moment it is mainly ash.
Miles McClagan said…
If I let the love of Christ pulsate through my body, can he help Collingwood win a flag?

If not, not interested...shallow, but, ya know!
freefalling said…
I wonder how they view themselves?
And how they view non-believers?
They seem somehow 'removed'.
I find it troubling.

Popular posts from this blog

Hold me now, oh hold me now, until this hour has gone around. And I'm gone on the rising tide, to face Van Dieman's Land

Theme Thursday again, and this one is rather easy. I am Tasmanian, you see, and aside from being all around general geniuses - as I have amply described previously - we are also very familiar with the concept of WATER. Tasmania is the ONLY island state of an ISLAND continent. That means, we're surrounded by WATER. That should help explain why I take so many photographs of water . Tasmania was for a long time the place where the British (an island race terrified of water) sent their poor people most vile and horrid criminals. The sort of folk who would face the stark choice of a death sentence , or transportation to the other end of the world. Their catalogue of crimes is horrifying : stealing bread assault stealing gentlemen's handkerchiefs drunken assault being poor affray ladies being overly friendly with gentlemen for money hitting people having a drink and a laugh public drunkenness being Irish Fenian terrorist activities being Catholic religious subversion. ...

Something unpleasant is coming when men are anxious to tell the truth.

This is the moon. Have I mentioned how much I adore the zoom on my camera? It's Theme Thursday you see, and after last week's limp effort, I have been thinking about how I might redeem myself. Then I clicked on the topic and discover that it was BUTTON. We've been hearing a lot about the moon in the past couple of weeks. Apparently some fellas went up there and played golf and what-not forty-odd years ago. The desire to get to the moon, however, was not simply about enhancing opportunities for Meg and Mog titles and skirting local planning by-laws in the construction of new and innovative golf courses. No, all of your Sputniks , "One small steps" and freeze dried ice cream was about one thing , and one thing only : MAD Now, I don't mean mad in terms of "bloke breaks record for number of scorpions he can get up his bum", no I mean MAD as in Mutual assured destruction . When I was a young man you see, there was a lot of talk about the type of m...

But when the strong were too weak to hurt the weak, the weak had to be strong enough to leave.

Can you believe that it is time for Theme Thursday already? Today we are not talking chocolate , toddlers , mess or ignominy . No, today we're dealing with ANIMAL . Now I could have posted a picture of a possum, numbat, wombat, wallaby or any other furry killing machine that roams our fair isle, but I figure that I'd use a far more deadly creature as an example of an animal . Some people - I know them as fools - have chosen to embrace that highfalutin idea that human beans are for some ungodly reason superior to animals. Of course, what these imbeciles seem to forget is that were are simple animals ourselves ! Anyone with a baby, toddler, teenage boy or Queenslander in their household could tell you this. Look at Henry [above]. One chocolate frog in the back of the car on a sunny day and all of a sudden it's Elagabalus meets Bacchus for a quick shandy in the Serengeti and we're down on all fours carrying on like a cat in heat. Fair dinkum, anyone who chooses to ...