Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Believe me when I say that the following statement is not idle boastfulness or patriotic nonsense: the Hobart City Council’s Salamanca parking inspection crew are the world’s most diligent, efficient, ruthless and bloodthirsty parking inspectors in the world.

Within seconds of someone's parking docket running out of time, you can be guaranteed that one of the boys and girls in [powder] blue will be there ready, willing and able to unpeel one of their little orange stickers, print out the notice of fine, and smile all the while.

My favourite sight is seeing the orgasmic bliss on the face of one of the brave soldiers of justice when they manage to ticket a car already possessing a ticket. I'd expect back flips on that rare occasion when you get the treble.

I'm thinking of distributing little yellow ribbons in honour of them.

Comments

Babzy.B said…

Ah Ah Ah everywhere the same story ;)

20 October 2009 at 18:04

Roddy said…

I do believe that the parking in Hobart has been privatised, thus the more tickets the more money. All the car parks to my knowledge are now private. No heartache for the councils.

20 October 2009 at 19:55

yamini said…

Sounds good, though, I'm sure the offendors will not be as pleased.

21 October 2009 at 18:01

Kris McCracken said…

As a non driver, I admire their verve!

26 October 2009 at 14:38

Ah, Joe, you never knew the whole of it...

I still have the robot on the job. Here you can see the Tasmanian Museum and Art Gallery . And here is a poem: Soliloquy for One Dead Bruce Dawe Ah, no, Joe, you never knew the whole of it, the whistling which is only the wind in the chimney's smoking belly, the footsteps on the muddy path that are always somebody else's. I think of your limbs down there, softly becoming mineral, the life of grasses, and the old love of you thrusts the tears up into my eyes, with the family aware and looking everywhere else. Sometimes when summer is over the land, when the heat quickens the deaf timbers, and birds are thick in the plumbs again, my heart sickens, Joe, calling for the water of your voice and the gone agony of your nearness. I try hard to forget, saying: If God wills, it must be so, because of His goodness, because- but the grasshopper memory leaps in the long thicket, knowing no ease. Ah, Joe, you never knew the whole of it... I like Bruce Dawe. He just my be my favourite Austral...

There was nothing left. No reason, no conscience, no understanding; even the most rudimentary sense of life or death, good or evil, right or wrong.

Here is a self portrait. I’m calling it Portrait of a lady in a dirty window . Shocking, isn’t it? However, it is apt! Samhain , Nos Galan Gaeaf , Hop-tu-Naa , All Saints , All Hallows , Hallowmas , Hallowe'en or HALLOWEEN . It’s Theme Thursday and we’re talking about the festivals traditionally held at the end of the harvest season. Huh? No wonder Australians have trouble with the concept of HALLOWEEN. For the record, in my thirty-two L O N G years on the planet, I can’t say I’ve ever seen ghosts ‘n goblins, trick ‘n treaters or Michael Myers stalking Tasmania’s streets at the end of October. [That said, I did once see a woman as pale as a ghost turning tricks that looked like Michael Myers in late November one time.] Despite the best efforts of Hollywood, sitcoms, and innumerable companies; it seems Australians are impervious to the [ahem] charms of a corporatized variant of a celebration of the end of the "lighter half" of the year and beginning of the "darke...

Hold me now, oh hold me now, until this hour has gone around. And I'm gone on the rising tide, to face Van Dieman's Land

Theme Thursday again, and this one is rather easy. I am Tasmanian, you see, and aside from being all around general geniuses - as I have amply described previously - we are also very familiar with the concept of WATER. Tasmania is the ONLY island state of an ISLAND continent. That means, we're surrounded by WATER. That should help explain why I take so many photographs of water . Tasmania was for a long time the place where the British (an island race terrified of water) sent their poor people most vile and horrid criminals. The sort of folk who would face the stark choice of a death sentence , or transportation to the other end of the world. Their catalogue of crimes is horrifying : stealing bread assault stealing gentlemen's handkerchiefs drunken assault being poor affray ladies being overly friendly with gentlemen for money hitting people having a drink and a laugh public drunkenness being Irish Fenian terrorist activities being Catholic religious subversion. ...

This will hurt me...

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