Thursday, December 24, 2009

There are four kinds of people in this world: cretins, fools, morons, and lunatics.


Nothing says Christmas in Tasmania more than 舞狮. Yes, the lion dance! This lion was spotted foxtrotting down Argyle Street during the Hobart Christmas parade, clearing away stray elves and Christmas goths in order to make way for an impressive and colourful dragon.

Have a Christmas Eve story!
Trudy

A mere slip of a girl, Trudy had the filthiest mouth this side of the docks. Yet she had the face of an angel. Uncouthness aside, she possessed a razor sharp mind, particularly vis-a-vis her two favourite subjects: men and desire.

Men, Trudy believed, were simple creatures. Her theory was straightforward: for the most part, men were slaves to their desires, particularly those of a sexual nature. Holding court with her merry brand of brightly-branded acolytes, Trudy would reflect on the topic for hours.

“Even the most educated of men – if in possession of a fully functioning [ahem] member – is a hair’s breadth away from the condition of slavering dog. A mere hint of breast or thigh can reduce as easily Doctor of Philosophy as a street sweeper.”

This knowledge – confirmed by years’ experience – should have stood her in good stead, for such power is of great value. Alas, her power came with a weakness. In recognising their feebleness in such matters, Trudy felt pity.

Pity was Trudy’s weakness.

She hated herself for it.

21 comments:

Hood Photo Blog said...

Thank you so much for stopping by my blog and commenting. Have a wonderful holiday season, and a very Happy New Year!

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

Strange combo!! Strange.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!

notaphotographerbutiplayoneontv said...

Thank you for stopping by the blog today. I wish for you and your family the very best the holiday season has to offer and look forward to more of your wonderful posts in the coming year.

Kris said...

Hood Photo Blog, thanks!

Kris said...

Mary, and joy to all men [and women and cats etc etc]!

Kris said...

nota..., fingers crossed.

tapirgal said...

Wonderful dragon! I'm trying to remember where I saw one a couple of years ago. Ah, yes. It was in California near San Jose. The colors here are luscious!

Kris said...

Tapirgal, they are always out and about during the Chinese New Year period around these parts.

Tom said...

aha! merry Christmas to you...

Kris said...

Tom, and to you and yours!

Who Is Tim Burton? said...

Hi! Kris,
Nice photograph...of the Hobart Christmas parade.
Note: Trudy's story too funny!
Thanks, for sharing!
DeeDee ;-D

Kris said...

DeeDee, poor old Trudy!

Sarah A said...

Merry Christmas! Thanks for the greeting on my blog from Rancho Palos Verdes, CA, USA.

Betsy said...

Hey Kris...hope you and your adorable family have a wonderful Christmas! :)

Halcyon said...

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you as well. I often wonder what it would be like to live in a place where Christmas is in the summer. Must be fun!!

yamini said...

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you, Jen, Henry and Ez!!!!

Kris said...

Sarah, I hope that you had a good one!

Kris said...

Betsy, it was fair to middling.

Kris said...

Betsy, it was fair to middling.

Kris said...

Halcyon, then there is the bushfires...

Kris said...

Yamini, and to you too!