All things atrocious and shameless flock from all parts to Rome.

NAB HQ. Corner of Elizabeth and Liverpool Streets, September 2010.

The National Australia Bank (or NAB) is one of the largest financial institutions and banks in Australia in terms of market capitalisation and customers. Apparently, NAB is ranked the seventeenth largest bank in the world measured by market capitalisation. That makes NAB bigger than such luminaries as Citigroup (US), Morgan Stanley (US), Barclays (UK) and Deutsche Bank (figure it out yourself). Just for the record, the NAB is only the third largest Australian bank, so we’re punching above our weight in the global financial world down here in Oz.

Which leads me to today’s Sunday Top Five, the Top Five Things That Australia Leads the World In (beginning with the letter ‘S’’!

Sheilas: this one should come as no surprise to anyone paying attention. Australian sheilas are renowned the world over for their good likes, fine figures and ~~filthy mouths~~ strong opinions. One simply cannot compile a list such as this without them.

Snags: Although I will confess to being a connoisseur of German-style snags, Australian butchers are renowned for their innovative and economical expansion of the concept. Henry and Ezra are fine judges of a snag, and regularly, they are able to choose between locally produced beef, pork, chicken, lamb, roo, wallaby, and possum. Personally, one of my favourite snags contains the humble crocodile – which I have enjoyed a number of times – but as yet they haven’t quite penetrated the Tasmanian butcheries yet…

Stupidity: don’t get me wrong, I believe that stupidity is a universal human quality found in every nation, race, religion, gender and geographical region on Earth. That said, like all fields of human endeavour: runnin’, jumpin’, throwin’ stuff; many Australians have excelled in the global stupidity ranks. Feel free to nominate your examples in the comments!

Snakes: We love our snakes down here at the arse end of the world. Unfortunately, our snakes are not always fond of a cuddle. Indeed, Australia is the only country that has more venomous snakes than non-venomous species! I advise all visitors to our great land to keep an eye out for snakes wherever they are, whether in the bush, scrub, billabong, beach, nightclub etc.

Shags: Australians love a shag. Men, women and children all day long, in all parts of the country, can be overheard debating the merits of a good shag. Every time that we leave the house, you can be guaranteed to see a shag or two. Aussies are mad for shags. As this blog has demonstrated over the years, the Little Pied Cormorant is perhaps the most beloved Australasian waterbird!

Ah, Joe, you never knew the whole of it...

I still have the robot on the job. Here you can see the Tasmanian Museum and Art Gallery . And here is a poem: Soliloquy for One Dead Bruce Dawe Ah, no, Joe, you never knew the whole of it, the whistling which is only the wind in the chimney's smoking belly, the footsteps on the muddy path that are always somebody else's. I think of your limbs down there, softly becoming mineral, the life of grasses, and the old love of you thrusts the tears up into my eyes, with the family aware and looking everywhere else. Sometimes when summer is over the land, when the heat quickens the deaf timbers, and birds are thick in the plumbs again, my heart sickens, Joe, calling for the water of your voice and the gone agony of your nearness. I try hard to forget, saying: If God wills, it must be so, because of His goodness, because- but the grasshopper memory leaps in the long thicket, knowing no ease. Ah, Joe, you never knew the whole of it... I like Bruce Dawe. He just my be my favourite Austral...

There was nothing left. No reason, no conscience, no understanding; even the most rudimentary sense of life or death, good or evil, right or wrong.

Here is a self portrait. I’m calling it Portrait of a lady in a dirty window . Shocking, isn’t it? However, it is apt! Samhain , Nos Galan Gaeaf , Hop-tu-Naa , All Saints , All Hallows , Hallowmas , Hallowe'en or HALLOWEEN . It’s Theme Thursday and we’re talking about the festivals traditionally held at the end of the harvest season. Huh? No wonder Australians have trouble with the concept of HALLOWEEN. For the record, in my thirty-two L O N G years on the planet, I can’t say I’ve ever seen ghosts ‘n goblins, trick ‘n treaters or Michael Myers stalking Tasmania’s streets at the end of October. [That said, I did once see a woman as pale as a ghost turning tricks that looked like Michael Myers in late November one time.] Despite the best efforts of Hollywood, sitcoms, and innumerable companies; it seems Australians are impervious to the [ahem] charms of a corporatized variant of a celebration of the end of the "lighter half" of the year and beginning of the "darke...

In dreams begin responsibilities.

A life at sea, that's for me, only I just don't have the BREAD. That's right, Theme Thursday yet again and I post a photo of a yacht dicking about in Bass Strait just off Wynyard. The problem is, I am yet again stuck at work, slogging away, because I knead need the dough . My understanding is that it is the dough that makes the BREAD. And it is the BREAD that buys the yacht. On my salary though, I will be lucky to have enough dough or BREAD for a half dozen dinner rolls. Happy Theme Thursday people, sorry for the rush.

This will hurt me...

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